Ode to Flamboyance
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            Michael met his last lover, Ramon, in Spain. After returning to the States, he called Ramon, only to hear from his mother that he was dead. Much later, hearing that Ramon was alive, he called again, demanding to speak to him, then rushed back to Spain to care for the dying man. Michael also recounted how Ramon had hit him during a car ride, while Michael was being overly dramatic. While telling Reigns not to share this story with anyone, he clearly enjoyed telling it, remarking that he never thought he would stay with a lover who hit him. In fact, he confessed that this was the incident that straightened him out.

            Reigns shares many stories about Michael’s sense of humor and rebellious spirit. Newly required to wear a tie for work, he put it on his forehead, as his employers had never specified where it was to be worn. At a Christmas party he tied mistletoe to the crotch of his jeans. Reigns once related to Michael, over the phone in an airport, that a man was touching himself while staring at Reigns. Michael’s remark and Reigns’ loud reaction caused the man to run away, to their delight. Michael had a small table in his home with photos of dead friends. When Reigns once showed up to his house late, he found that Michael had put his photo on that table.

            A fan of Judge Judy, Michael scheduled doctors’ appointments around episodes and dreamed of running into her, since they both lived in Naples. He also enjoyed Andrew Holleran’s work, giving Reigns a copy of Dancer from the Dance and remarking that “it was his memoir.” Six years after Michael’s death, Reigns got a copy of Holleran’s latest book, appropriately titled Grief.

            In an early poem, “Sting,” Reigns remembers being terrified of bees as a child, hearing stories of people dying from their stings. As a teenager he was both fascinated and frightened by older gay men, wary of the virus they might have but intrigued by their experience. This led him to clubs at fourteen and later to Michael, who helped ease his fears. Still, disease haunted him. He spent a day after a risky sexual encounter on the phone desperately trying to get medication—this is how he remembers his young adulthood. After Michael’s death, Reigns thought of his friend as very old, but he realizes now that he’s older than Michael ever was. Issues of aging that he deals with, like glasses and back pain, are ones that Michael never had to worry about.

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