Instant Karma? So, one fine day in June on Moses Lake, Washington, two boats were cruising along, one carrying a crowd of LGBT vacationers under a rainbow flag, the second a group that was hurling anti-gay slurs and making obscene gestures as they zoomed in circles around the first. Then, without warning, in the words of an eyewitness, “their boat literally blew up.” It was all caught on video and watchable on YouTube, where one can see the full fury of the blaze as it consumes the boat, whose former occupants are seen bobbing in the water. The video was filmed from the “gay boat,” which is now heading in the direction of the blaze in order to—wait for it—rescue the party of bobbing homophobes. Which they do. The Newsweek report added the following curious detail: The boat’s driver “literally sh*t his pants, as everyone saw when his shorts fell off in the water.” People were calling it a case of “instant Karma,” but it could just be that the bad guys blew their engines by spinning circles around the Rainbow Roger. Either way.
Backfire Three otherwise unrelated stories have one thing in common: an anti-gay incident that prompted people both gay and straight to rally in defense of those who were being harassed, boycotted, or ostracized for their sexual orientation:
1. When a fifteen-year-old boy in Spain named Mikel Gómez decided to wear a skirt to school, he was pulled out of math class, sent to a psychologist, and grilled about whether he identified as transgender or wanted to be a girl. Answering in the negative, he explained that he’d dressed that way to show solidarity with the women’s movement. Nevertheless, he was forced to change into pants and ratted out to his parents. Mikel made a video of the whole ordeal and posted it on TikTok and got two million hits. What happened next was that—in an “I am Spartacus” gesture—other boys throughout Spain began wearing skirts to school and posting their vids, and soon male teachers were donning skirts. Mikel has now organized skirt day as a monthly event, keeping its focus on women’s rights, for which it has become a symbol of solidarity in Spain.
2. After a Lufkin, Texas, bakery named Confections posted a photo of their Pride-themed cookies, a major customer sent a vitriolic message and canceled a huge order. Confections was left holding the bag of unsold cookies, so it was back to social media to lament the situation. Facebook friends immediately placed orders for the unsold wares, and the orders kept coming in. When the owner opened the store the next morning, a line started forming at the door until it stretched around the block. This pattern repeated itself for the next few days, and now people have started placing regular orders for baked goods to be delivered to nursing homes and special events.
3. What started out as a symbolic gesture had unforeseen consequences for the Polish city of Krasnik (pop. 35,000), whose councilors thought it would be a neat idea to declare the city “free of LGBT.” What exactly that might mean in practice wasn’t entirely clear, but the implications were troubling coming from this devoutly Catholic area in southern Poland, and the outside world took notice. Since the 2019 vote, companies and whole countries have severed their ties with Krasnik, costing the city millions of dollars. A French town ended a partnership with the city, and Norway withdrew a plan to give $10 million in grants for economic development. Perhaps the gravest outcome of the declaration—which probably violates EU mandates on tolerance—is that, in the words of Mayor Wojciech Wilk, “We have become Europe’s laughingstock.”
X’ed Out What if they gave an “ex-gay” rally and no one came? That’s pretty much what happened when a group calling itself Changed held a “Freedom March” in Washington in June. Everything was in place—an imposing stage from which to address the multitudes; a band blasting rock music as if to a throng—everything, that is, except the throng. There weren’t even any counter-protesters to justify all the hype—a sure sign of a flop. Oh, a few “ex-gay” participants did show up and can be seen dancing in the vast plaza that was rented with such high hopes, though most of them were passers-by, according to reports. Organizer Elizabeth Woning tried to put a positive spin on things (“testimonials were shared”), but couldn’t explain the low turnout. So try this on for size: the target market for this rally, people who identify as “ex-gay,” essentially doesn’t exist. And even if there are a few who inhabit some corner of the Internet, they sure aren’t out and proud about it.
Tragedy and Farce Pretend this story has a happy ending and that it’s part of a modern French farce. What you need to know is that there is (or was) a Brazilian rap sensation named Kevin Nascimento Bueno who performs as MC Kevin, and that he’s been married for a few weeks to his beautiful wife. So, it seems MC was kicking back at a resort hotel, or actually engaging in three-way sex with a woman and another man—fashion model Bianca Domingues and his very good friend Victor Fontenelle—when a knock came on the door. MC figured it was his wife and panicked, resolving to escape by slipping out the window and onto the terrace below. So here’s where we need to pretend that it’s just a farce and that he landed safely on the neighbor’s chaise longue rather than falling to his death five stories below. The police investigation found evidence of heavy alcohol and drug use, which could explain the klutzy exit. But back to the French farce: it turns out the knock was a friend trying to warn MC that his wife was looking for him. By all rights the next scene should be MC trying to explain to his wife how he wound up with a fractured ankle on a stranger’s lanai.
